September 26, 2009 / / La Liga
September 26, 2009 / / Team News
Baby please don't go! Everybody, hold him down!
Baby please don't go! Everybody, hold him down!

So, Boat Forever and others have been wondering: Why haven’t we seen The Yaya in two consecutive matches now? Worries about a rift between he and Barca managment have cropped up, etc, etc. And now there are the latest rumors, that Citeh will come charging in with a pigpile of money for The Yaya who, if you believe the Britpress, is “desperate” to play alongside his brother Kolo (who isn’t Toure Kolo, as he is Toure Yaya …. but that’s another musing).
Read MoreSaturday musings: The Yaya and being in the crosshairs

September 25, 2009 / / La Liga

La Liga Preview: Málaga-Barça, Saturday 2pmEST, GolTV

MalagaAway0809 Well, it’s back to more La Liga action as we roll into the weekend for a trip to typically sunny Málaga on the southern coast. It’s a big travel week for our boys, who were up in Arctic Circle Santander on Tuesday (I think every American sports fan reading this just laughed at Santander to Málaga being a big travel week).

Remember last time we were in Málaga and it wasn’t quite so sunny? Yeah…I watched the game at Downtown Bar and Grill in Brooklyn, home to wonderful beer and, well, just me that day. Empty as could be, but it had GolTV and I wasn’t headed to Nevada Smiths.  It was quite amazing to watch that game and get progressively more sloshfaced alongside our boys getting progressively more and more, well sloshed on the field. It was early November and the weather was unusually nice outside in NY, but in Málaga, not so much. Hopefully this time will be a bit drier. Read MoreA Return to the Pond: Málaga – Barça

September 25, 2009 / / Barcelona

Messi-Xavi-Racing

Every now and then a goal comes along that highlights some important concepts in our philosophy and tactics.  In my arbitrary opinion, our second goal against Racing does exactly that. So, follow along as we break down that goal second by second. Read MoreAnatomy of a Goal: Racing Edition

September 25, 2009 / / Team News
Um, the foot bone's connected to the....
Um, the foot bone's connected to the....

Hey, whoa, that was fast. After training normally with the squad yesterday, Zlatan Ibrahimovic has been given the green light to play against Malaga, and is named in the squad list. I reckon it wasn’t that bad, after all. Good news.

Dmytro Txigrinski is expected to start against Malaga, as the Ukranian hair man makes his way into becoming a more regular fixture in our lineup. Um, and by the by …. Captain Caveman and Kaiser, we have some contracts for you both to sign. We’re just saying. No pressure or anything, though. Nope. 😀
Read MoreIt’s the Friday news, in brief: BANGS is back!

September 24, 2009 / / El Banquillo

I know that this is late, but there were some technical difficulties in getting it posted. My apologies. -Isaiah

Episode 3: In Which Real Madrid convenes their yearly player meeting to discuss tactical changes, greet new personnel, and do a little math…

Read MoreEl Banquillo 3: The Empire Strikes Back

September 24, 2009 / / Team News

spy-vs-spyAll right, you caught me, I admit it. I hired a private detective agency to make sure that Hector, Kevin, and Tarun weren’t up to no good during their free time. It was well worth it, of course, and totally above board. Except I didn’t tell anyone and I had the detectives comb through their garbage and open their mail in order to find out that 1) Hector spends his evenings punching a voodoo doll of Maradona in the face, 2) Kevin can outride my poor detectives on his bike, and 3) Tarun plays soccer in the evenings with, er, me.

Seriously, though, I didn’t do that. I wouldn’t have. Because that is just crazy.

Barça’s General Director Joan Oliver would like to point out that it isn’t at all crazy. It’s a natural and accepted part of figuring out who should stand for president in the next election. Here’s all that I’ve gleaned: In March or April one of the many vice presidents, Joan Franquesa that Barça has thought that he was being followed by someone. Creepy, right? So Oliver assigned a detective agency to find out what was going on…and also assigned that agency to follow 3 other VPs whose only crimes were the ability to stand for president in the upcoming election cycle. Read MoreNews I Found By Looking Through Your Garbage and Mail

September 22, 2009 / / Injuries
Did we kill them, or what? Who's next?
Did we kill them, or what? Who's next?

It was a perfect match, played perfectly with a full team effort, and everybody doing what they were supposed to, then Rafa Marquez had to go and screw it up.

So, imagine this: Both clubs wind up tied at the end of the season, in the league and head-to-head, and it comes down to goal differential. We’ve given up 3 goals in two matches, none of which were supposed to be. Pardon my sounding like Guardiola after the 5-2 win vs Atletico Madrid, but this can’t happen.

“Oh, we’re still up by 3” is not a viable consideration, to my worldview. Read MoreRacing 1, Barca 4, a.k.a. “Almost there. Almost.”

September 22, 2009 / / La Liga
September 22, 2009 / / Team News
September 22, 2009 / / La Liga
September 21, 2009 / / La Liga

MessiSantander0809
There’s no way he can…not a chance…oh. my. god.

Racing Santander – Barcelona: Tuesday 4pmEST

Here’s how you suck at life: show a repeat of Vitoria vs Internacional from the Brasileirao on Saturday or show an also not-live “Jorge Ramos y su Banda” for 3 hours. If you chose the first option, you’re GolTV. If you chose the second option, you’re ESPN Deportes. Seriously? You choose to show those instead of live Barcelona action? Jerkoffs.

No, seriously, you’re a bunch of jerkoffs.

Of course I’m pissed off by that fact, even though it shouldn’t be particularly surprising. I’m still going to DVR both of those shows in order to see if they weren’t just messing with me because ESPN Deportes is showing “Futbol Español” from 2-4pm and might just change their programming if they can get the rights. No doubt Jorge Ramos and his frickin’ Banda will draw more viewers…It’s possible that it’s actually RFEF’s fault because they’re constantly messing with times and dates and don’t have a collective bargaining agreement, but whatever, I’m going to fault the TV stations right now cause I want to. Read MoreYour Equinox Be Damned: Racing – Barça