????

To tide everyone over until Isaiah’s vengeance-laden post goes up, turn your brains to a task: Guess what this is a picture of?

To explain: The chutaculo is precisely what it sounds like: you test your fancy new boots by taking shots at your friend’s backside. On deck we have a passel of canteranos, including Muniesa, Dos Santos and Assulin, laughing their asses off as they try to hit each other’s …. well …. asses.

Have fun.

BUY BUY BUY!!!!

Rumors have been rampant about our transfer targets for the coming summer. Who will we sign? How much are we willing to spend? Will cules be suckered into voting for a particular presidential candidate based on who he promises to bring to the club? Well, it’s been narrowed down a bit, so here we go, let’s compare the two major players currently in the Barcelona orbit to see who is the better fit.
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I am wearing all black, because I am a jinx.

So. Here’s what we officially have to say on the Cesc Fabregas matter:

“Given the exceptional repercussions created by the stories that have appeared in different media with respect to an agreement with Arsenal FC player Cesc Fabregas, Barca flatly deny that there have been any negotiations or agreements with the player.

“In accordance with FIFA regulations, FC Barcelona’s contract policy has always made it a priority to negotiate with the club of origin before making any particular agreement with the player. FC Barcelona wishes to stress that it has always maintained excellent institutional relations with Arsenal FC.”
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Watch and love.

Miku and Soldado have no idea what’s going on.

Valley of Puebla and Popocateptl (LCP, funksterwtf.blogspot.com)

First, I’m back. It was a good vacation, but now I’m back and you will be seeing a lot of me around these parts over the coming weeks. If I slip accidentally into Spanish, please forgive me. It’s going to be a rough transition to not saying “oye guey que pedo” every time I see someone. (Above is a picture of Puebla, where I was)

Secondly, it’s time to get to know your Second Half predictions. I previously posted the competition rules and now that I’m reunited with my lovely laptop, I will be tracking how well everyone is doing throughout the rest of the season.

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Prithee, fair damsel! I have just scored a goal!

So, of all the bizarre things that can be attributed to our beloved club and our very own Andres Iniesta, an increase in the birth rate?

This week, Barcelona hospitals have seen a 45% increase in the birth rates. How ’bout that? They have gone from 9 or 10 deliveries per day, to 14-15.

Now, when he scored the “Iniestazo,” I wanted to scream, and cry and run around the room, for sure. Apparently people had other ideas.

Not sure what else to say, except keep it clean, people. News post coming later.

Y’all didn’t think that I was just going to leave that sit, did you?

Without further ado, here are the results of the Barca love/hate poll. But first, a word on methodology. Anybody who ran a laundry list of players past the filters, got their first name chosen, the theory being first to mind=most beloved. So there.

Most loved: 3-way tie between Xavi, Iniesta and Messi
Most hated: Marquez, in a landslide
Interesting to note: A few players made both lists: Krkic, Alves. Busquets was second place on the hate list, and Keita even made the hate list, though with caveats.
Most surprising name(s) on the hate list: Alves, Ibrahimovic
Surprising they didn’t get more votes: The Yaya (just one)

Finally: Yes, Hleb made some lists, but those votes didn’t count, since he isn’t a current player. Neener, neener.

This is about the simplest post that I have done in a while, but at the halfway point of the season, as we revel in the meaningless distinction of being winter champions, let’s have a love/hate post, as in:

What Barca player do you love, and what Barca player do you hate (note that this can be a mild dislike, if hate is too strong a descriptive.)
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Ladies and gentlemen, this is about honor.

So, you think you’re pretty smart, dontcha? Sure you do. You’re out in Internetlandia, in your little comfy arm chair, relaxing, thinking about what’s about to happen next in the world, and then you realize that Barcelona Football Blog has updated. You swivel your little intergalactic information super highway navigator our way and find, lo and behold, that Isaiah has published a table of how the world will look come the end of the season.

And you laugh. And you criticize with your mocking and your comments and your vicious looks as I walk around the streets of the city I call home. I know you what you’re thinking! And I’m here to challenge you. That’s right, I’m challenging you–all of you–to a second half prediction game.

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