Author: Kxevin

In my fantasy life, I’m a Barca-crazed contributor over at Barcelona Football Blog. In my real life, I’m a full-time journalist at the Chicago Tribune, based in Chicago, Illinois.

December 3, 2009 / Kxevin / La Liga

Xerez 0, Barca 2, a.k.a. “Sleepwalk your way to success.”

As James Brown sang in the amazing “Mind Power,” You know, we’re dealing with a very critical and crucial time, the most critical and crucial time that I’ve ever witnessed …. the educators, they call it ESP, positive thinking right? Some of the people over there on the other side of the pond call it mind vibrations. But I call it what it is is what it is.

So what your mind does is, it tells you things, even though you don’t want to listen to it. If you’re the mighty FC Barcelona, kings of all you survey, your mind is telling you “Dude. Chill. What have these guys scored, like 4 goals or something? We got this. Just relax.”

If you’re bottom-feeding Xerez, what your mind is saying is “You can make history today, if you find more than you think you have, more than you will ever have again. Be mighty. Now get to work.”

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November 20, 2009 / Kxevin / Injuries

The news, a.k.a. “Okay, this is getting silly now. Stop it.”

So, here is our list of the knocked, or potentially knocked: Ibrahimovic, Puyol (sorta), Abidal, Keita, Txigrinski (sorta). This kind of sucks, given that two giNORMOUS matches loom in the coming week.

So what can we do to top that? I know, let’s add some H1N1 to the party. Why not? Abidal has been diagnosed with the mis-nomered “swine flu,” and The Yaya is suspected to have also contracted it. Now, “la gripe” is no biggie if properly treated, but you can rest assured that part of the medical plan for getting over it is not “Go play a crucial football match.”

Augggh!

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November 19, 2009 / Kxevin / Champions League

Comings and goings, a.k.a “Who’s in, who’s out”

Okay. My bag is already packed for Barcelona, that’s how geeked I am about this trip. I have two matches, the Inter Champions League and El Clasico.

Now who the hell am I going to be seeing for these matches?**

First off, let’s discuss the import:

If we lose against Inter and Rubin Kazan beat Dynamo Kyiv, we are out of the Champions League. Huge.
If we lost against the EE at home, we go down to them in the standings (presuming that we both win this weekend), and lose significant space in the psychological war that is a Liga season between the two giants.

But ….

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November 19, 2009 / Kxevin / Thoughts

Bile and vituperaion, a.k.a. “L’Affaire Henry”

I’m going to begin this piece by saying what some of you already know, but for those who don’t: I love Les Bleus. I picked them to go all the way in 2006, and I will pick them again in 2010 (hey, that rhymed). I was thrilled when the goal was scored in extra time yesterday, actually screaming and falling off my office chair. There was even a big ‘ol lump in my throat from the joy, a joy tainted with sadness because this meant that Ruh-Roh Dumbassnech would remain as the France coach.

Then I saw the replay of the goal.

And I didn’t feel like crying any more. I wanted to hide my head in shame as a surrogate for Thierry Henry.

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November 15, 2009 / Kxevin / Team News

Mascherano? 40m? Where did I put my Hector Pills?

Right-o, kids. The freakin’ January transfer window isn’t even open yet, and we supposedly have a deal with Javier Mascherano for just north of 40m. Or we don’t. It might only be about 34m. One complexity is that we want him in January, but Liverpool don’t want to have him leave until the summer.

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November 15, 2009 / Kxevin / Thoughts

News, Saturday edition

Hey, slick! Guardian says you're coach of the year!

–Coach of the Year. Has a nice ring to it, doesn’t it? UK paper (and a darned respectable one) Guardian says that our very own Pep Guardiola is their coach of the year. He has, and I quote, “The young Barcelona coach has quietly turned a team of underachievers into world-beaters.”

And so he has.

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November 14, 2009 / Kxevin / Liveblog

Spain v Argentina LiveBlog

November 14, 2009 / Kxevin / Team News

It’s Internationals time again, a.k.a. “Fear and loathing”

henrybleu — Just don't get hurt....just don't....

It was July 9, 2006 and I was standing in the viewing room of the French consulate in Chicago, weeping alongside a room full of other fans of Les Bleus. Yes, I had won the Chicago Tribune’s World Cup pool by betting my heart (Les Bleus all the way, as I will bet again this time out, if they make it.) rather than my mind, because I just knew.

I knew that Zinedine Zidane had one more magical tournament in him. That Patrick Vieira would be able to hold down the midfield, Yaya-style, while Zidane sashayed about on his Xavi-esque flights of fancy, giant feet flapping and distributing. I knew that Thierry Henry had more magical goals in him.

I just knew.

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November 11, 2009 / Kxevin / Barcelona

Barca 5, Cultural Leonesa 0, a.k.a. “Rockin’ it old school like”

Hey, tell dad how good we were! Really! LOL!!!!

I wasn’t expecting this one. We all laid out predictions of a tight scoreline from a club content to just get the job done, and move on to the next round. But the kids weren’t going to allow that to happen. They wanted blood, and blood they received. Yes, Messi and Xavi scored, but this was about the groundwork done by the young’uns, who ran and capered about, colt-like, peppering the Cultural goal with chance after chance, parried by their hard-working keeper, until suddenly, the finger popped out of the dike, and thus began the great flood.

It was beautiful.

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November 9, 2009 / Kxevin / Barcelona

Barca 4, Mallorca 2, a.k.a. “Next time, don’t wear white.”

Hi, ladies. Check out this thigh. Nice, right?

So you’re at this party in a gorgeous house, and the staff passing the drinks and snacks are supermodels. The music is perfect, and you’re having a great time. But there, on the corner of a rug that probably costs more than you make in a year, is a dog turd. It’s a little one, and nobody is really noticing it.

At least, they’re not actively acting as if they’re noticing it. And suddenly, you begin to notice other things …. that supermodel has nose hair, that other one has a sway back, you have a better music mix on your music player, if you really want the truth of it …. and so it goes.

And you’re cranky, because you should be having the time of your life but thanks to that little turd on the Bokhara, a little luster is gone.

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November 7, 2009 / Kxevin / Barcelona

Barcelona vs Mallorca LiveBlog

Barcelona v Mallorca LiveBlog

November 5, 2009 / Kxevin / Champions League

Rubin Kazan 0, Barca 0, a.k.a. “Chances wasted”

Quite frankly, I don’t know. This review isn’t going to be very long, because simply put, there isn’t a lot to say. Xavi came out after the match and said that we were the better team.

No, you weren’t. You know how I know? Because you didn’t win the match. Last time I checked they don’t give points for possession, or number of passes strung together to no avail.

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