A Belated Welcome to Kiko Femenia

It's Kiko!

It hasn’t been announced by BFB for some reason (maybe because he’s signed for the B-team) but Kiko Femenia is offically a Barca (B) player. He was bought for 2m + 1m in variables from Hercules and signed a 4-year* contract. According to ZubiZa, he’ll mostly reside in the B team but will also play some games for the first team (as per usual for B-team players). He has passed his medical tests and is good to go. I’m not sure when he’ll sign his contract officially, but he’s ours now. Bwahahaha!

*Technically, it’s 3-years with an option for a fourth, but I say 4 anyway.

Five things about Kiko:

  • He speaks Catalan.
  • He is hot but also looks like a stoned surfer plays attacking midfield.
  • He suffered a panic attack in his Liga debut for Hercules. His coach kept on yelling at him, but was walked through the match by teammate Rufete on the sidelines.
  • His finest memory was subbing into that game in the Camp Nou.
  • His biggest attribute is his speed according to stats from Football Manager via Jnice (all scores out of 20).

Welcome Kiko! May you do well and not suffer any anxiety attacks!

In other news (not of this world. Hehehe), Sergi Busquets believes that with Thiago and Fontas being definitely promoted, our squad is complete [BarcaTV via barcastuff]. To which I say: Child please. We need another CB. Milito does not meet our needs.

Windmill hands (Pedro!!) has extended his contract to 2016 and has increased his buyout clause from 90m to 150m.

Gerard Pique is white water rafting. He blames Shakira’s lack of synchronization for the fall. I blame him if he gets himself injured.

Our Juvenil A squad will be compete in the European U-19 club competition called the NextGen series [fcbarcelona.cat]. However, Javi Espinosa, Gerard Deulofeu, Rafinha Alcantara, and 5 other players won’t be in that squad because they have been promoted to Barca B! Yay!

Barca returns to the football pitch in less than two weeks (13 days as of now) to play Hadjuk Split in Croatia. Move faster, time. (Please don’t remind me of the US tour. I was priced out of the Man Utd game in DC. Sigh…).

Diego Maradona told Argentine newspaper Ole* in an interview that “we [Argentinians] are being very unfair to Messi. If he wins the Champions League, he’s the best of all time. If [the Argentina NT] can’t win two games, it’s all his fault.  The Argentine people shouldn’t treat the best player in the world like this. We don’t have Xavi, Iniesta, Pique…it’s impossible imitate Barcelona. We have to play as Argentina.” He goes on to criticize the lack of Pastore and the midfield. Wow.

*English translation by AFP [via Xingxian in the comments].

Transfer Watch:

Udinese has confirmed to the Italian media that we’ve offered B-team hot shot Jonathan Soriano as part of the deal for Alexis Sanchez. It is unclear who “the Italian media” are. Marca has their own agenda and say we’ve offered Henrique, Hleb, or Keirrision. Other people (like tribalfootball) believe that Soriano is off to Austria to play for Red Bull Salzburg, having agreed to a 4-year deal. I wonder who to believe? (Hint: None of them matter).

David Villa says Cesc Fabregas is a weakness. I agree. He and this whole fiasco is slowly weakening my grasp on reality.

(He actually said that Fabregas is a weakness for him and that he has a preference blah blah blah hopefully will be added to the team bleh bleh bleh. On a different note, he also wants to win more titles and enjoy many more minutes).

And Sport can just go to heck for this comic. You’re part of the reason why it seems that way! (Translation for comic: Close, far, close, far, close, far, close. Fabregas: Because of this whole soap opera, what I’m close to is insanity).


Hehe. Credit Jose for the ‘y-u-no’ idea. I forgot how much I loved that meme.



By Kari

Just your neighbourhood Barca fanatic


  1. I can’t believe that Gerard was just sitting their on the bow. Grab an oar and paddle, man!

    I also can’t believe the raft pilot aimed right for that standing wave. Capsizing guaranteed.

    I also can’t believe that neither the Cesc nor the Sanchez deal is done.

    Okay, wait, I can believe that the Cesc detail is not done.

    1. I can’t belive Gerard was just sitting on there on the bow

      I know, right? Trying to be cool or something, Geri?

    2. It’s not a true sporting event unless Pique comes out bloodied, and where else to sit for that to occur than right at the front?

    3. I’ve been whitewater rafting, and they often let people take turns sitting the bow, because it is fun. Having said that, that was some very bad piloting to make them capsize like that! Isn’t there something about avoiding dangerous sports written in players’ contracts? It’s why Valdes can’t get that Harley he has always wanted.

    4. I am not denying it isn’t fun up front, but on any boat I am paddling in, famous pretty boy athlete’s going to be doing some paddling, not sitting on his million dollar cule, grumble grumble.

      Really, I just wish I was out there rafting…

    1. That or he’s already riding the branding train and he’s been paid to wear the shirt. Which would be smart.

    1. Despite the painful nature of watching weeks of matches devoid of any midfield play (including this one), I have to say that match was inspiring, and a real roller coaster.
      That Abby Wombach is a warrior. Once the calls started going against them and Brazil started shenanigans with the clock and they couldn’t get a ball for throw ins she was relentless on the ref about adding time, and they needed it, and she capitalized on it. She was hollaring at the team to keep them alive when they were tiring from playing down one. Very inspiring individual performance, and vey emotional match.

  2. Xingxian, I added your link into the post. It’s a good one as it’s translated into English (which I was too lazy to do).

  3. Wow!
    Batista makes Maradona look like an actual coach and talk like someone who has a little clue about tactics. If the interview is real, Maradona might really have learned something from his mistakes and watching Argentina under Batista. He would do better now than he did in WC ’10 (and certainly better than Batista does right now – but that’s not a great deal).

    About Piqué’s rafting tour: Anybody knows where it took place? Colorado river?

  4. And if I haven’t said it before, thank you to Kari for putting together this news post. It takes longer than people think to assemble the information and links, so cheers for that.

    And I love that cartoon from Sport! Did they have Sesame Street in Spain too?






    (He’s coming, you know it.) 😀

    1. Blitzen..are you holding out on valuable info??? If so do tell please 🙂 I’m on the ” I won’t believe it until he poses infront of the crest” bandwagon.

    2. Graham Hunter is convinced he is coming and he always speaks the truth. So there.

    3. *plugs ears* Lalalalalala I CAN’T HEAR YOU.

      ‘Thanks for thinking me! After all, I only make news posts once in a blue moon. 😀

  5. I’m just gonna sit here and pretend I’m not happy at getting a shoutout in this post. Playing it cool… yeah.

    In other news, Mexico U17 are world champions :mrgreen:

    1. Todos somos Julio Gomez!! Mexico City is crazy right now, every other person on the street is wearing a bloody head bandage 🙂

  6. With Colombia’s win today 2-0 over Bolivia, Chile, Peru and Venezuela have all advanced to the quarterfinals of the Copa America. OMG.

    (Congrats Lev, Dani_el! Oh snap, Argentina and Brasil…)

    1. aah! and I just read that this is the sixth time in a row that Peru advances to quarter finals in copa america. (considering that it’s the 8 best team of 10-12, I know it is not that much, but it is still great .)

  7. 😆 at Neymar’s agent. This is really a case of him putting himself over the player’s interests.

    Riberio (agent Neymar): “I didn’t like president Rosell talking directly with the player and not with me after they had Santos’ permission. If I had to choose between Neymar joining Real Madrid or Barcelona, it would be Madrid”.

    Maybe Rosell was wrong to do that but he still should listen to his player. Now it looks like he is the one choosing clubs for the player.

  8. @fcblive : At the Arsenal press conference in Malaysia, Arsene Wenger confirmed that Cesc Fabregas will stay in Arsenal. (via @aeroberg)

    now please Rosell, buy players that we NEED… pretty please?

    1. He did no such thing. He confirmed that he wants Cesc to stay at Arsenal and that he is proceeding on that basis.

    2. @aeroberg
      Wenger asked about[sic] Fabregas again. He says Cesc will stay.

      Wenger: “Talks with Cesc? I never speak on matters that happen behind closed doors. I’ve given enough headlines already.” [via guardian]

      Wenger (coach Arsenal): “This story for Barcelona has gone on for years, we have to close it and focus on the season, hopefully with Cesc.”

    3. Key word being “hopefully”.

      “Our position is always the same – we want to keep Cesc and I will fight as hard as I can to keep him. Samir Nasri is exactly the same. We will do everything we can to keep him,” said Wenger. “I’m confident we can get both of them to stay.”

      “fighting” to keep him and “getting” him to stay. That’s no sort of confirmation.

  9. We definitely need a pure striker for the team, considering that Bojan will leave and for depth and quality. i have been thinking about this and really want to know what the BFB community thinks of Radamel Falcao for Barcelona. What do u guys think? would it work?

    1. I believe he is currently the most wanted striker on the planet. As far as a pure no. 9, he would be a fantastic signing.

    2. yeah, i think so too. the guy checks all the boxes.
      i am still baffled by the fact that barca has not approached the market for a top quality central defender and a backup striker, positions that most need reinforcements. maybe they are working quietly behind the scenes. but considering barca’s track record in dealing transfers, i wouldn’t be surprised if they just try to compete with madrid for unnecessary marquee signings, rather than try and genuinely improve the squad.

    3. The only problem I see as to why he may not have been approached by the club is that he operates in the same space on the pitch that Messi plays, between the defenders and the midfielders, in the central forward region of the pitch. He does not have the same flexibility as Villa who can play on either wing supporting Messi in the middle.

    4. thanks for letting me know.
      as scandalous and blasphemous as it may sound, what’s wrong in recruiting someone who could give some competition for messi? 😀
      Surely we can have two accomplished players for the CF/10/free roaming forward role?

  10. To long time Barca fans, did Michal Laudrup leave for free or for a price? I was reading this article where a commentator says he left for free when his contract was out, he quotes his autobiography as a source.

    But that link to all Barca transfers Kari posted says he was transfered for 9.6m, and so does the author of the article.

    1. Free transfer. Real shame, that. He was IMO one of the best midfielders of all time and Cruyff just let him go.

    2. He fell out with Cruyff, who effectively stopped playing him. Cruyff is a genius, but man-management was never his strong point.

    3. Another thing. How much did we buy him from?
      FCB Transfers spreadsheet and the author of the article says 3m from Juve, but the said commentator says he arrived to Barca on a free transfer as well.

  11. i don’t care what happened between him and cruijff, he should never have gone to EE after playing in the dream team…

  12. Wait a second, sergi roberto renewed?

    Someone posted a link and no one even rejoiced? You lot need to focus on the real news!

  13. warning: on-topic

    as much as i am enjoying barça’s golden age, am I the only one thinking it is pretty sad that the league’s best team can buy another Liga-player basically for our segunda division B-squad?

    1. Well they bought him from another segunda team, so its not a step down for him. Hercules was relegated, remember?

    2. And the fact that he’s only 20. The fact that he transferred to Barca B gives him more of a chance to make something of his career than Hercules ever could.

  14. I am not very well versed with Argentina football. But does anyone know why Batista doesn’t like Pastore. I mean, it seems the entire world (forget Argentina) is shouting for his inclusion, yet he seems adamant to leave him out. Was there any fight b/w those two or does he not fit into his plans?

    1. If I recall correctly Batista had a falling out with Pastore when they were both with the Argentina U-20 side or something along those lines.

  15. @blitzen

    it’s not a confirmation about him definitely stays. but it’s a confirmation that Arsenal will fight until the last second to keep him. and that’s it for me.

    full interview from Arsene Wenger :

    I cannot believe my boss will hold a stupid meeting during Argentina – Costa Rica match. from all the time, they choose now. ¿Por qué?! I’m devastated. 😥

  16. Ah, now off to go watch Argentina stumble and sleepwalk their way to another awful, atrocious, soporific, saddening performance… can’t decide whether they’ll be terrible and get knocked out, or whether they’ll be terrible and win with a bit of luck or individual skill such as a brilliant Messi run and shot which comes off the post for Higuain/Tevez to tap in, after which everyone hates on Messi and Argentina get slaughtered in the quarters.

    1. It’s very strange. Batista drops Tevez, Lavessi, and one of his defensive midfielders, but brings in Gago instead of Pastore! Apparently Aguero and Higuain are starting as well… surely it can’t be worse than the selection for the first 2 games, but he seems obstinate to not give Pastore any minutes.

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