Some of these writers can be such cotton-headed ninnymuggins. Here goes one right here in this very space, poo-pooing the f’in bananas out of a poor, defenseless rumor. Yeah, it’s some tyrannical overlord hemming and hawing and derping all day, looking for ways to bring in some chump change on a spurious rumor. There is no vast, periodical-based conspiracy. There is no SPECTRE.
The thing about these rumors is that it’s the naysayers that make them rumors instead of facts. It’s our “hero” Simmons, whose push for grammatical correctness and inability to see that rumors just need to be believed that keeps our dreams from coming true. A rumor is just a fact that hasn’t been supported properly.
Like Buddy, wandering the streets of New York looking for someone to prove him right simply by believing, these rumors merely need your support, your love, and your total, unfailing belief in them and poof they will become reality. There was no man on the moon, but everyone believes it so much that Neil Armstrong shot into space on a shopping mall ride. Without putting in a quarter.
Cesc for a bottle of cava and a Darth Vader pez dispenser? Check the “I believe” box and he’s all ours. Alexis Sanchez? A bottle of the boss man’s signature cologne and a hearty pat on the back for Udinese owner Giampaolo Pozzo from one Señor Messi.
Build it and they will come.