Videos of The Enemy: Shakhtar’s Legs vs. Roma [Edit with another octopus]

Highlights of Shakhtar’s Legs against Roma. It shows the goals and a little bit of the buildup. Take a look; it’ll give you at least some idea of what we’re dealing with.

First Leg: AS Roma – Shakhtar (2-3)

A short, meh quality video, but it gets the job done. There are better ones on YouTube, but embedding has been disabled on those videos. Snap!

Second Leg: Shakhtar – Roma (3-0)

We’ll have to link this one because embedding has been disabled. *sad face* It’s 15 minutes long though and I recommend you guys watch it.

Below is a video of Douglas Costa to give you an idea of how fast the dude is. I recommend Adriano playing this match, simply because Maxwell is far too slow to keep up with him (Don’t kill me, Jim! 😛 )

[EDIT] Ukraine have their own version of el pulpo Paul (that’s Paul the Octopus). If you don’t know what exactly was so great about Paul, and also have a theory he was killed by the Germans and made into some kind of exotic dish, you are weird and very much like myself. If you don’t know who Paul is and want me to get to the point, that’s many of you. He’s basically a octopus who swam to the brightest, colorful-est, and shiny boxes and correctly predicted all of Germany’s WC matches, including the loss to Serbia and Spain.

He has since died.

In the below video, another unnamed octopus has “predicted” a Barca win. I predict we win because we are better than Shakhtar.

[credit: viktoria261191] <-- is it really that necessary to put that many numbers?

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Just your neighbourhood Barca fanatic


  1. Nav
    April 5, 2011

    The best thing about EEs win over Spurs is it puts a temporary end to “LOL LA LIGA IS SHIT EPL IS THE SHIT” talks.

    • April 5, 2011

      Best thing? That implies there were more reasons to be happy EE won. I’d replace it with the only thing good about EE’s win over Spurs. #nitpickingbecausethat’swhatIdo

      • Helge
        April 5, 2011

        I actually might think of another food thing.

        The fans might have bigger expectations now, some of them are already yelling “Bring on Barça!!!” in the depth of the world wide web. But to be honest, this match was over after 15 min, and it was never a challenge from that point on. Still it took them almost 60 min. to settle the game.
        Real won convinvingly today, but the enemy played its part (almost a bit like Inter did in Schalke’s victory).
        A semi-final against either us or Shakhtar will be a LOT harder.

        Let’s see how Real copes with a tough opponent, on next weekend, when they face Athletic Bilbao at San Mames.
        Spurs were pathetic today, and once again, Bale failed to impress (just like I noted in a comment some hours ago, he’s overrated!).

        • Helge
          April 5, 2011

          mmh… food and good, never noticed it’s so close on the keyboard before 😀

        • Jim
          April 5, 2011

          Can’t agree, Helge. He was the one threat Spurs had and it was a thankless task after Crouch was sent off. He had four or five runs down the left that threatened, plus a beautiful take on his chest on a through ball where if he’d slowed slightly Ramos would’ve been into the back of him. He also got Pepe booked and should’ve had Ramos booked for a blatant body check. Not to mention setting VDV up with a massive throw in which he should have finished. This is all in his first game back after 10 out and obviously still not fit? We should be so lucky to have a LB like that ( and yes I’m certainly including Maxwell in that ) 🙂

          • Helge
            April 5, 2011

            When your team loses 4-0 to Real Madrid, I’m not impressed by any of its players, full stop!^^

  2. Jim
    April 5, 2011

    Wouldn’t dream of killing you, Kari, but I would remind you that it is more about starting position than pace most of the time. Having said that, Maxwell hasn’t played for a while so it’s asking a lot. Let’s hope we’re not talking about defensive gaffes on a breakaway after tomorrow 🙂

      • Jim
        April 5, 2011

        If it happens, I’ll be in no mood for gloating, trust me. I don’t put Maxwell’s case for my own benefit – it’s because I think he’s the best defender we have for that position.

  3. April 5, 2011

    I am as jolly as they get. This game made up for Sporting loss.

    I wanted to made a couple of comments:

    1) A big thumbs up and a tip of the hat to Kari! That was a great tactical post you put up there! This is what you said when you first joined this site:

    “Don’t expect any reviews/previews/tactical awareness/SoMa goodness/etc. from me.”

    I don’t like liars, but i will make an exception 😉

    2) For those who were wondering what the Ronaldo celebration was and comparing to to the one Messi makes in tribute to his grandmother. That sign he makes is for his son who travels and watches his games all the time. Apparently in real life it makes him laugh all the time.

    3) @ Euler: Not that anyone is keeping scores, but i guessed right on the formation that Tottenham will roll out tonight 😀 Not that they played with more than 10 men for more than 20 minutes! Although now that i see how the game went, i would say that formation failed drastically. Or at least the players just cracked under pressure. People under estimate playing against 80,000 fans at such a high level. It will be interesting to see how Shakhtar handle the pressure tomorrow.

    Best of luck, even if i don’t really mean it 😉

    • April 5, 2011

      Hey! I believe I said “don’t expect it”, not “it’ll never happen”! Assumptions, assumptions! I take the compliments, however. 😛

      Re: Thong Boy celebration. I didn’t see it, but I love Ryan’s air-fondling expression, so that’s what I’m going with.

      Congrats on the win, even though I don’t really mean it. 😉

  4. Miguel
    April 5, 2011

    Brooks Peck hating on Pep’s peach sweater he was wearing at the press conference ahead of the clash with Shakhtar:

    The FCB coach demands the utmost respect for Lucescu’s side, saying “they are a very strong opponent who have improved in recent years … it’s a great side, a super-team, they’re aggressive, they defend well and work likes animals … they’re a top side and that’s why they’re in the quarters, and that’s why they walked all over Roma and came top of their group ahead of Arsenal”.

    • blitzen
      April 5, 2011

      I have to agree with Brooks on this one, that is one nasty sweater. I expect better from you, Pep!

      Also I hate when he shaves his head all the way down like that. Leave a little stubble, why don’t you?

  5. April 5, 2011


    I’m not really following your point. It’s difficult to make much of what their intended formation was given how quickly they went down to 10 men.

    But the Spurs were basically playing a 4-4-2/4-4-1-1 while Crouch was in the game.

    Van Der Vaart does not function as a true midfielder for their club when they play the way they did today. He’s really a shadow striker in possession who then tries to run back to midfield to defend.

    This is one of the big issues that English clubs have over and over. They love to play “target men” but a target man isn’t particularly useful in knocking down balls unless there is another player paired with him to collect those knock downs. For the spurs that’s often Van Der Vaart.

    The problem with that is that VdV isn’t the fastest player and as they try to split his role from offense and defense it often means he’s at risk for playing nowhere.

    The Spurs were outnumbered in the midfield area today 3 vs. 2 as I thought they would be even though they played VdV, Modric and Sandro.

    The Spurs didn’t play a 4-2-3-1 really.

    VDV was not playing much in the middle of the pitch and Sandro wasn’t really playing between the lines as a holding player. Sandro was more or less level with Modric and Jenas. Take a look at the UEFA positional charts for the first half.

    Congrats. RM’s skill and pace just overwhelmed the Spurs. You guys blitzed them off the pitch very quickly and they could never recover. Once Crouch went off it was not even competitive.

    To have any chance of winning the Spurs needed to play a very narrow block and sit deep and then play the ball to the wings where they could generate numerical superiority. But they never did any of that due to RM’s pressure.

    Trying to play two ways, Rednapp left his team disorganized. You can’t try to retain numerical equivalence in midfield while also trying to provide your target man a partner.

    • April 5, 2011

      hmmm, I wasn’t trying to make a point really. I just remember us having a little convo in which you anticipated that they would roll out with a 4-4-2 and play with two forwards, while i suspected that they would go out with a 4-5-1 and play Crouch alone upfront. Hence why i said the starting formation was the one i predicted. And thats why i said they didn’t get to play with their formation for more than 20 minutes. On paper, when Tottenham rolled out at the start of the game, their intended formation was the one trying to attempt a 4-2-3-1, with the wingers doing a lot of tracking back. That formation crumbled adter the 2nd minute.

      My comment was a failed attempt at pocking a little fun and a joke i guess…

      I do agree with everything else you said though.

      • April 5, 2011

        But the Spurs did play a 4-4-2. In possession Crouch was not playing alone up top. He was paired with VDV. Tottenham didn’t intend on playing a 4-2-3-1.

        Palacios did not play. And Modric was not playing in a deep holding position.

        That’s my confusion. They were playing a 4-4-2 from what I could tell.

        I’m sure you watched the game more closely than I did so I’ll defer to you but it seemed to me that they were basically in a 4-4-2 as VDV was acting as a second striker not a midfielder.

        Perhaps it’s just an issue of how one interprets VDV’s role.

        • April 5, 2011

          I didn’t watch the game live. I downloaded it and watched it. Will be doing a second viewing tonight with what you said in mind. Maybe my assumption that they will play a 4-5-1 blinded me. Will look again…

          I will look at VDV’s position more closely.

          • April 5, 2011

            Let me know what you think. I was watching casually while doing other things. And it wasn’t a very long period of time during which they were at full strength.

            I did look on the UEFA starting and average positioning and it also looked like they were playing two at the top.

            VDV plays an odd role for them.

  6. soccermomof4
    April 5, 2011

    Nervous about tomorrow, especially with the flea saying he’s only so-so. But just when I’m ready to wallow in Pep induced (man, is that guy depressing lately) misery, along comes el Pulpo Paul version 2.0 to lift my spirits!

    • Nav
      April 5, 2011

      Why nervous? Believe in our team, they’ve done great things already 🙂

      • April 5, 2011

        I’m sure she believes! I know I shake, literally, before every (big) match. No joke. I’ve got this cule thing bad.

      • soccermomof4
        April 5, 2011

        Nervous? Why?
        Because of the aforementioned Messi’s ouchie booboo and Pep’s surly comments (seriously, the man’s depressing the hell outta me, I hope he’s not that negative while talking to the players). Then there’s the Abidal and Puyol thing. People more experienced than I are prophesying doom and gloom.

        Optimistic because:
        I know we are the best team, we SHOULD win this. We will win; the cephalopod hath declared it thus!

        And even if they don’t *shudders*, they still are a great team and have done enough awesome things already to fill our cule hearts with happiness!

        • April 5, 2011

          I think I got all of ’em!

          +100 for SoMa4 asking me to edit her comments!

          • soccermomof4
            April 5, 2011

            +1000 to you for protecting the English language from me!

        • Nav
          April 5, 2011

          It’s Pep’s job to downplay expectations — he’s never going to say “Yeah we’re gonna steam-roll ’em, bring it on bitches”.

          Even without Messi we’ve got a formidable team. Provided we show up tomorrow, I think we’ll do well.

          And even if we don’t, as you say, this team has provided us with joy already anyway — they deserve the benefit of the doubt at this point. 🙂

          Will it be a hard game? Hell yes, but I think we’ll manage. We’ve gotten results out of hard games before. And hey, who wants an easy road to the finals anyway? 😀

  7. Lev
    April 5, 2011

    congrats Bassam. Really disgusted with Spurs right now, but then again I was already really upset that EE drew the Spurs to begin with. They could have at least given you a game though. Didn’t get to see the game until the 2nd half and when Adebayor scored goal no.2 ten minutes later I went back to work, disgusted. Now Mourinho can rest all his players at will for the only three matches left that matter to EE: the clasicos.

    PS – Had you predicted Bale to start on the right flank, then I would have been impressed 😉

    • April 5, 2011

      Haha, i was really surprised to see that! The dude actually switched flanks!

      Thanks! What is most surprising is that Spurs did better right after Crouch left (or maybe we did worse?) and then in the second half, they just lost it again. Yay to resting players while you guys fly off the Ukraine 😀 But then again you can rest players against Almeria while we can’t against Bilbao.

      • Lev
        April 5, 2011

        Maybe the Spurs didn’t actually play better but EE just thought, mwehh let those impotent Brits come at us for a while so that we can pick them apart….

        • ooga aga
          April 5, 2011

          it’s fine, we will rest players in the league match at the bernabeu so we have them in top shape for the CL

        • Noslehcimretep
          April 5, 2011

          One of the few good things I’ll say about them: solidarity with EE fans on the satisfaction of beating English teams will never grow old. Although it would be even better to share it with Villarreal and Valencia.

          • ak
            April 6, 2011

            i have to say that the only english teams i detest are chelsea and united only, i’ve got nothing against the others. And i really wanted spurs to win, after all the flattering things Redknapp said about us in the summer.

  8. BarcaGirl_Indo
    April 5, 2011

    I always said I wanted to draw against Schalke or Spurs…

    damn, Barça would’ve trashed Spurs too if they play like that!

    I’m 99% sure EE and Schalke will progress…


    Jnice started it first… *runawaycoveringmyhead*

    • April 5, 2011

      Nah, it’s alright: say it loud and proud.

      If you and Jnice want to support the team we spanked 5-0, it’s aite with me 😉 😀

      • BarcaGirl_Indo
        April 5, 2011

        deep down inside, Jnice and I always have a fond love to the team that you guys call Evil Empire… we’re just to shy to admit it… 😉
        and they’re not evil at all! how can a team with an Angel in their squad are evil?


        now this is the real me talking :
        I hate them with every atom of my body… or with with a fiery passion of a thousand suns, credit to Kari…
        I will give UCL title to any team, other than EE… or Inter… 😛

  9. Para
    April 5, 2011

    On the offside, Ramzi mentions a whole host of Shakhtar players that only need another card to miss the next match. Does Barcelona have any such players? How many cards are needed in the CL?

  10. majatt
    April 5, 2011

    Interesting that no one has mentioned douglas costa in the discussion. He looks extremely dangerous, that right side cutting onto the left foot looks frighteningly familiar. They got him for 6M and we got Kierisson for 15 and haven’t even played him :-/

  11. blitzen
    April 5, 2011

    Aaaaahhhhh!!!!! Crackovia site is offline again! 🙁 🙁 🙁

    • Miguel
      April 5, 2011

      Ha! Right? WTF? Bad enough I can’t watch the Lakers play tonight.

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