There has been discussion of what went on between managers Ståle Solbakken and Pep Guardiola after last night’s Champions League match. BFB has received exclusive footage of the encounter and has employed a series of lip readers in order to provide you, the sporting public, with the truth behind the “dust up” that has the world so riveted…
Scene: A medium-sized stadium in northern Europe at the end of a match. Two well-dressed men are walking together on the sideline.
Pep Guardiola: Good match.
Ståle Solbakken: Agreed. Both teams played very well.
Guardiola: I like your scarf.
Solbakken: Thanks! You’re is okay too.
Guardiola: Just okay?
Solbakken: I mean Burberry is always a handy touch.
Guardiola: It’s warm and stylish. Yours is just boring monochrome.
Solbakken: It’s not my fault others say you’re the ex best dressed manager in Spain.
Guardiola: You take that back this instance, mister!
Solbakken: Never! Mourinho is a graceful stag! You wear rags!
Guardiola: I will hide pictures of Alves’ wife in your house!
Sergio Busquets: Whoa, whoa, calm down guys.
Solbakken: You’re lucky your horse is holding me back, Pep!
Guardiola: Nice defense, Sergio. Maybe some of that in the game would have helped?
Solbakken: Burn! [the two high five]
Busi: I just wanted to help and you go and be mean. [runs away sobbing]