I got 99 problems but M*drid ain’t one


1. Blessed

2. Beloved

3. Admired

4. Idolized

5. Celebrated

6. Applauded

7. Worshipped

8. Deified

9. Envied


10. Humble

11. Enigmatic

12. Patriotic

13. Silent

14. Stubborn

15. Determined

16. Generous

17. Joyful

18. Fearless


19. Skillful

20. Inventive

21. Efficient

22. Precise

23. Fast

24. …er with the ball than without it

25. Intelligent

26. Visionary

27. Complete


28. Proficient

29. Instinctive

30. Predatory

31. Accurate

32. Powerful

33. Delicate

34. Imaginative

35. Relentless

36. Decisive


37. Brilliant

38. Gifted

39. Sublime

40. Prodigious

41. Excellent

42. Unlimited

43. Special

44. Masterly

45. Genius


46. Great

47. Phenomenal

48. Magnificent

49. Incredible

50. Amazing

51. Wonderful

52. Marvelous

53. Superb

54. Fantastic


55. Sensational

56. Awesome

57. Spectacular

58. Wondrous

59. Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious

60. Extraordinary

61. Stunning

62. Awe-inspiring

63. Playstational


64. Incomparable

65. Singular

66. Exceptional

67. Inimitable

68. Unique

69. Matchless

70. Unsurpassable

71. Pre-eminent

72. Best


73. Alien

74. Supreme

75. Celestial

76. Omnipotent

77. Divine

78. Monstrous

79. Extraterrestrial

80. Heroic

81. Human


82. Pibe

83. Culer

84. Albiceleste

85. Blaugrana

86. Latino

87. Pulga atómico

88. …y diabólico!

89. Inmessionante

90. D10S


91. Glorious

92. Relentless

93. Champion

94. Purposeful

95. Unstoppable

96. Triumphant

97. Exalted

98. Victorious…


99. Finalist




By no means is he Infallible. But come Saturday, let’s hope he has that chip on his shoulder. Take us to the Treble. Let’s scream our lungs out.

Categorized as Barcelona

By Levon

Culé since way before football boots were of the neon yellow and lizard green variety, Levon is a deep thinker with increasingly shallow thoughts. He lives in Barcelona with his gorgeous wife and daughter. The lucky bastard...


  1. Let’s hope Chiellini and Bonucci bully him around a bit for the first fifteen minutes, plus the ref makes some decisions he doesn’t agree with. If that happens, I don’t see many chances for Juventus making it through the game without him scoring at least twice.

  2. Have especially liked the humbleness shown by the players and stuff. No big mouthing and silly arrogant comments.
    The Juventus players have had their various says. Hope the maestro heard Mr Chiellini’s comments.

  3. Even after such a special solo goal, when he sees Alves near him, he points to him, like he always do to thank for the assist. That was incredible.
    Am hoping too, that someone had communicated what Chielline said. Cant wait..

  4. Chiellini also said that Messi is God and that he’s been the absolute best footballer of the last 30 years. In fact, all Juve players praised him to the high heavens.

  5. Well i respect Juve and it s a final but i am not nervous about Saturday.I trust this team like i was sure about the final in London 4 years ago….And we have the God of football;-)

  6. Only messi can have these many adjectives… And this big one too (Supercalifradilisticexpialidocious – no idea what this means but sounds good…. Thank goodness there is a copy paste option)

  7. .

    Why is Lucho’s future uncertain?
    Why the hell aren’t they locking him down?
    Why was Neymar’s flick such a big deal?
    And why did Lucho make such a daft statement?
    Does he know he’s on his way out of the club?
    How can his position be so uncertain after such a stellar year?
    Why is Dani asking for more salary than Neymar?
    Was that Messi’s best goal? Is this his peak?
    How will the final play out?
    Will we win by 3 goals? or lose by one?
    Why am I asking so many questions?
    Why have you spelt Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious wrong?
    What is the meaning of this article?

    1. Don’t know about the others but your fourth question is the answer to your first question 🙂

  8. Why have you spelt Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious wrong?

    No idea. Fingers don’t always do what the brain tells them. [EDIT – I corrected the mistake, though. Thanks!]

    What is the meaning of this article?

    Really? [EDIT – Definitely not the deepest piece I’ve ever written. I suppose you can interpret it however you want!]

    1. There are certainly parallels – we had just bought Romario and with him the offense was amazing. And then it fell apart, and it was the real end of that era.

  9. Levon for Fifa president.

  10. .

    Looking ahead to the champions league final and the various matchups, it is seeming increasingly obvious that the team that makes the fewer defensive mistakes will take home Big Ears.

    In Goal, Buffon slightly edges out Ter Stegen, as good as MAtS is.
    Juve – 2, FCB – 1

    In attack, FCB are overwhelmingly superior to Juve.
    FCB – 2, Juve – 0

    In midfield personnel, you’d have to say Juve are a bit stronger
    Juve 2, FCB 1

    FCB – 4, Juve – 4

    Which leaves us with the defence.
    Who will make the fewer errors?
    Can the formidable Italian Backline hold MSN for 90 minutes? or an additional 30? Or will the short backline of alba, alves and masch be vulnerable to the set piece and aerial dangers posed by juve?

    Hope our attack prevails.

  11. Blatter made a big mistake by not giving the WC to USA and UK.If he did that nothing would happened.Corruption and blah blah.

    1. It wouldn’t have made any difference. The FBI stumbled upon this case by way of a corrupt American FIFA official, Chuck Blazer. Apparently the guy was renting out a NY apartment in the Trump tower of $6000 per month….for his cats!

    2. Given their recent history, it is highly doubtful that the US law enforcement agencies would go after such a large international organization with the pure and innocent goal of handing out justice.

      It all likelihood the main motivation is different, but it’s not clear what exactly it is at the moment.

    3. While I love a conspiracy theory as must as the next man, I think it is simply a case of FIFA lacking the political protection in the States that other entities might have.

    4. I didn’t propose a conspiracy theory or claim to know what is happening, I just doubt the public explanation.

    5. I’m not saying you proposed a conspiracy theory, but by saying there is a motivation other than battling corruption… That would be what, political, economical? I doesn’t make any sense.

      I don’t think there is any ulterior motive other than some investigator catching wind of it and thinking “hmmm, nice catch…”

    6. Battling corruption does not make any sense either – corruption is the essence of the current american system of government, the main reason it’s not officially a problem is that it has been legalized.

    7. Yeah, but from time to time American citizens do end up in jail because of corruption and/or financial crimes. And like I said, FIFA has no political protection in the US.

    8. That might be the case – but I still doubt they would expend that effort if there were no additional factors involved

    9. I agree too. I dont think they went after FIFA because of Justice. Havent there been so many offences worth billions where prominent banks are involved, and that too within the boundaries of US.

      With two WC announcements, FIFA made enemies out of two bigwigs, USA and UK. And that too, went for Russia and Qatar. It all looks very clear.

      Would be nice to see what happens now. So now, all those poor nations who had benefitted, anyways for whatever FIFA reasons, will go back to their 80’s and UEFA region will benefit more?

    10. The FBI investigates FIFA because the US missed out on a sports event?

      I don’t buy it for even one second.

    11. That must be just one of the things Levon.
      Anyways, US has gone to done far more consequential and disastrous things, based on NOTHING. So I dont mind buying it.

  12. Why must it be one of the things? You’re convinced of an ulterior motive because of previous US interventions? Leaving aside the moral aspect of some of those consequential and disastrous actions you allude to, there have always been strong political (read: economical) reasons for them.

    Surely soccer is the main beneficiary of a FIFA cleanup? The rampant corruption has been an open secret for well over a decade. Don’t forget that the Swiss are running a parallel investigation also.

    1. Nothing positive has actually happened so far. There will be a new president. Some people will leave the organization. Others will replace them. That’s all we know.

      How those people will operate remains to be seen.

      I am not holding my breath in expectation for a rosy future of pure and innocent people working for the good of the game. To do that would be to ignore the fact that corruption usually works from the bottom up, no the other way around. Those who are not in position to benefit from really serious corruption like to blame those who are in such positions for being corrupt, but the reality is that the vast majority of them are not similarly corrupt for the sole reason that they don’t have the power. If they did, they would do the same things. I look at the candidates to replace Blatter and there is only one person there about whom I could say there is some chance (note: some chance, not anything approaching certainty) that he is not going to be more of the same, and that’s Figo. But the rest… Do you think a prince from the Middle East is not going to be corrupt? Corruption is the standard way of doing things there (and really, most of the world), they don’t know anything else, it’s a core part of the way they think and act…

      The other elephant in the room is that even if the whole upper echelon of FIFA is cleared out, this will not make much difference as long as the local federations remain as they are. And really, how are you going to change the local federations? Do I need to even start explaining what the situation is there and what kind of people run them?

  13. Capitalism is a system who loves corruption.So yes i dont buy that they want justice and all that.Blatter did a lot of things for world football.But offcourse west media will never say that.

    1. So does socialism, for that matter. In some unfortunate cases even more so.

      FIFA is officially a non-profit organization, though. Go figure…

  14. Socialism??What country had socialism??The only country i remember that tried was Chile back in 1971 and we all know what happened to president Salvator Aliente.With CIA help.

    1. Yes, I know what happened to Salvador Allende. I’m probably more versed in the history of US intervention in Latin America than most on this forum but, unless I missed something, the CIA did not invade FIFA headquarters to shoot Blatter in the head.

      I think unregulated capitalism has proved disastrous for the world as a whole, just like socialism has utterly failed pretty much in every country it has been applied. Other than that, let’s not hi-jack Barcelona Football Blog with political discussions.

    2. Yes i agree it s not a place to solve the problem of our world…lets hope for a better future of humanity:-)

  15. So what I’m gathering is that the U.S. soccer Federation is in colusion with the FBI to bring down FIFA bc they didn’t receive the 2022 bid? Ridiculous. Corruption allegations have been dogging FIFA for over 3 decades. FIFA is reaping what it sowed. The investigation into the organization itself is a byproduct of an investigation into an individual, who, when faced with overwhelming evidence, and the prospect of years in prison, decided to roll over and save his arse! Nothing more and nothing less. Does the U.S. attorney have a vested interest in taking down such a high profile organization and figurehead in Sepp Blatter? Absolutely. She wants to have that notch in her belt for her political future. However, to suggest the FBI cares about a decision on whether the U.S. won the right to host the WC 2022 is utter nonsense.

    1. Then why?

      [Messiah10, I’ve edited this comment and a previous one. Let’s do our best to keep this discussion respectful. – Levon]

  16. With all the hoopla over FIFA and Sepp Blatter’s eventual departure (would be great if he just left now!), the appointment of Rafael Benitez to Madrid seems to have gone under the radar. I can’t see him being an improvement to Ancelotti in the league, but he does do well in cup competitions. They probably just need a capable deputy to Modric, but who knows what attacking options they’ll go for this summer!

    1. I am perfectly happy with that appointment (and I hope I won’t have to eat my words around that time next year). I don’t see them improving much under him. I also don’t see who they would buy as another galactico other than Pogba…

    1. Since I’m boycotting the World Cup in Qatar, I certainly wouldn’t mind if whole nations follow suit. I hope it doesn’t come to that, though. I hope they’ll be forced to change the venue.

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