Caption this, pt. whatever

You kids know the rules. We put up a picture, and you get to create your own captions for it. The grand prize is the approval and cyber laughter of everyone in this fun-filled space. Ready? (Yes, that’s our own King of Catalunya, Joan Laporta.)

laporta crazy

By Kxevin

In my fantasy life, I’m a Barca-crazed contributor over at Barcelona Football Blog. In my real life, I’m a full-time journalist at the Chicago Tribune, based in Chicago, Illinois.


  1. Guy in the Beard(EE fan): Next time Blanco’s come to Camp Nou we will thrash you 6 – 0.
    Laporta: Muhahahahahahahahahahahaahahah!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Bring me another bottle of champagne.

  2. bearded guy looks like he is about to cry.
    Laporta looks like he is laughing his ass off…

  3. He’s probably saying.. “Whatever Pep can do I can do better. Hey DJ, play ‘Dance little lady dance’ again!”

  4. Laporta: “Common dude, a bet is a bet. Pay up.”
    Beard: “But I don’t want to do the Guardiola Shuffle! Besides, there’s no Michael Jackson on!”

  5. “Go JOAN”
    “You’re the man!”
    “Go JOAN”
    “You’re the man!”
    “Go JOAN”
    “You’re the man!”

    “Oh, pleaaaaase!”

  6. this is an excerpt from Tim Stannard’s LaLigaLoca Blog entry from yesterday. Funny as usual, but i absolutely had to put this up as it made me LMAO:

    “Still, better than Wednesday’s effort from AS, which boasted that Real Madrid have “activated an adaption plan” for Karim Benzema to help him out of his current French funk – which peaked in the early hours of Monday morning when the misfiring forward displayed the same accuracy with his shots as his driving.

    The eggheads at Castle Greyskull have decided it might help to get Benzema out of the hotel he has been living in since his arrival from Lyon, and arrange for some Spanish language classes.

    Benzema has been with the club for five months.

    The benefits of the language lessons, explain the paper, are that he can speak to his colleagues, join in with the jokes being made at the expense of his expanding girth and – best of all – “understand tactical instructions” from Manuel Pellegrini.
    The blog wonders how hard it can be to understand the words “price,” “35 million,” “hopeless,” “donkey,” “Negredo,” and “better.” “

  7. madrid se quema, se quema madrid (madrid is burning, madrid is burning)
    we don’t need no water let the mother****** burn!

  8. Off topic, but those guys at Skysports, Graham Hunter and Guillem Balague has this to say about Messi and their reason as to why he’s not playing so well.

    “He is going through a growing phase at the moment because it’s not just that second season syndrome where he is the most important player at the club, he’s actually got a girlfriend now and they are trying to break away from his dad and they are trying to buy a place together,” said Hunter. ”

    “Messi is showing his independence off the pitch as well and Sir Alex Ferguson would say that great, great players – even Ryan Giggs – have transition stages in their lives, not just their careers, that need to be well managed. I’ve got complete faith in him and his family – that will be managed.”


  9. Jose is the leader in the clubhouse….

    Apparently The Yaya had a talk with Guardiola, and all is right in the world again. We can only suspect that it went something like “Looky here, you planet-sized douche, if you don’t think that I know what I’m doing by saving your gigantic ass for the meat of the season, you must not be from this planet or something. Oh. Wait. That’s right. You aren’t. Well anyway, I love you, so let’s hug it out.”

    The Yaya blamed it all on silly rumor, and said that he is happy again, and will go back to deatroying the world.

    And hey, we get to give Filipe a look at how life could have been, had Pigface not been such as ass in negotiations with us. How ’bout that?

    1. I feel so sad that we couldn’t sign Felipe! He looked like he really wanted to come…but we have Maxwell now and it’s our job as Cules to try and support him as much as possible. Remember, he’s still learning the system and hasn’t been given the time to adapt into it like Henry and Ibra (just his luck that he’s competing with one of our most consitant defenders). I say when he gets over his identity crisis (like our expectations he’ll be Alvidal), he’ll be one to watch!

      Oh! And remember when Abidal used to “suck”, he admitted it himself! Lucky for him that he played at leftback so much, he finally improved. The only solution for Maxy is if he plays more! (But he may kill us with his giveaways/corners if he does 😛 )

    2. But Depor had the opportunity to be reasonable, instead of assuming that he was our sole option, and that they could jack us around. Then, when the Maxwell word came down, suddenly they wanted to negotiate in good faith. I hope we beat those bastards like a gong.

      Maxwell has to earn his pitch time with excellence when he’s out there. To his credit, he’s been a consummate pro, fully understanding his role with the side, rather than doing a Hleb. It must also be noted that the way we dealt with Hleb sent a very clear messsage: If you don’t like it here, get the hell out.

      I fully support that notion. 😀

  10. There are also some nasty rumors coming out of Portugal that Benfica will be looking to offload Keirrison. And Guardiola doesn’t want him, nor is returning to Brazil a viable option. Interesting.

    And Depor are already coming out and saying that they will be flooding the midfield against us, in an effort to disrupt tika-taka. Bring it. Because now, we don’t have to play tika-taka to score. Flick one in to Ibrahimovic, and watch the magic happen.

    Many are predicting a draw. I’m thinking that we win. I would have been more worried had Depor come before Xerez.

  11. Jose still the leader, even though I have to note that Laporta would almost certainly say: “Madrid, cabron, altre rom amb llimona!” 😀

    Even funnier, there’s another pic of him holding a bottle of champagne, and it’s shudder French champagne. So of course, one of the presidential candidates has said “I would have had a bottle of cava.”


  12. There was some talk above about Maxwell, but I wanted to get my .05 in.

    Am I the only person who thinks Maxwell is a replacement not for Abidal, but for Sylvinho? Sylvinho just did his job, was a model professional, a father figure in the locker room, and he was a bench player. From what I’ve heard from Maxwell so far it seems like he is willing to accept a similar role. I’d like to see Maxwell just act as a left back/left wing sub for 5 or 6 years.

    All I’m saying is, when it’s time for Abidal to leave, I expect a new starter to be brought in for the position, and Maxwell will continue to be second choice.

    1. I’ll second that thought, although eventually I’d like to see him partnering Pique in the middle

    2. captain caveman started off on the flank, and i think he should too. he’s definitely the next puyi. he even has his shimmery goldilocks.

    3. Alves-Botia-Pique-Muniesa

      🙂 ahh… our future looks bright … and don’t worry, Bojan is on the bench somewhere…

  13. Ah! Mexico has something of a tough group so far. Group A with host country and Uruguay.

    1. mexico v. south africa is the opening game.

      i don’t see any groups of death yet…

      oh shit mexico gets france!

      Group A: South Africa, Mexico, Uruguay, France
      Group B: Argentina, South Korea, Nigeria, Greece
      Group C: England, USA, Algeria, Slovenia
      Group D: Germany, Australia, Ghana, Serbia
      Group E: Netherlands, Japan, Cameroon, Denmark
      Group F: Italy, New Zealand, Paraguay, Slovakia
      Group G: Brazil, North Korea, Ivory Coast, Portugal
      Group H: Spain, Honduras, Chile, Switzerland

      maybe group g?

    2. Yeah, I mean Group A isn’t the group of death, but it’ll be tough for Mexico. Whats the percentage of hosting countries being knocked out in the first round?

  14. Group G of Death.. Brazil, Ivory Coast, Portugal and North Korea..

    Ronaldo vs Kaka, but Yaya would smoke them all!

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