Match day news, Barca edition

In the wake of a series of fascinating recent matches in which opponents have essentially tried to kick us off the pitch, it’s interesting that we can look to the rough-and-tumble Premiership, to show us how it’s done:

–In Spurs v Portsmouth, Jermain Defoe steps on a downed defender who had just given him a hard challenge. Straight red, no debate, no argument.

–In the Liverpool/Villa match, the ref who allowed the “beach ball” goal, Mike Jones, will be officiating in the Championship next match weekend. Yes, refs can be relegated for poor decision-making, and frankly, should be.

Contrast that with the stiff-lipped gits who run the Liga, who decided that the dimwit who let Weligton kick, swing at and stomp his way though that Maulaga match, is all good in the hood. It was a shameful display then and it’s even more shameful now, in light of what I think any Liga devotee would say was a “no blood, no foul” league, cracking down on behavior that might injure a player, while also making sure that bad officiating does indeed get its just desserts.

Not that the aforementioned two decisions will do anything at all to make the Liga stop being run like a local indoor league, that doesn’t care if anyone shoves their way into the 127-person capacity gym to watch the matches.

That “hee haw” sound you hear is jackasses, braying en Espanol.

Thong Boy has come out and said what we already know, which is that Messi deserves the Ballon d’Or. No shit, Sherlock. What say you hook us up with some information that isn’t tantamount to “the sun rises in the east,” eh? Oh. He also said that right now, we are a better team than the Evil Empire. Whew! I have to sit down after the mind-boggling revelations being offered up by the knocked-up Portuguese attacker. Next he’ll be telling me there’s such a thing as sliced bread, and I’ll have to go to the oxygen tent to calm my hyperventilating lungs. Criminy!

Guillem Balgue, of the “commerce available to you” blog site, says that Robinho to us isn’t going to happen, because there hasn’t been any contact regarding that matter between the two clubs. Guess he has Txiki B on speed dial, and all the world’s press is just making this stuff up.

–Which means the rumors that if Citeh can lure Franck Ribery to their lair as a replacement for Robinho are just one giant, steaming pile of bovine bollocks, right? Right? Just checking.

–And why is Sport insisting that the pace of the Robinho negotiations with Citeh has accelerated, with an eye toward having the loan deal (yes, loan) wrapped up by the beginning of November, middle at the latest.

–And the Daily Mail says that we’re giving up on Cesc Fabregas too. So there.

–In real news, Gabi Milito practiced normally with the squad, to the strains of much rejoicing. Because that’s what we need, right? Another world-class defender. Wonder if he can play forward? This is actually very, very good news for us, because Milito means that we can field a number of combo platter back lines, all ox-strong and raring to go.

–Happy 30th to La Masia the strong, squat-looking little building that sits unnoticed off to the side of the Camp Nou. The travesti indigenous businesspeople don’t even go over there, so strong are the vibes of excellence that emanate from that joint. It’s where young champions are made from humble beginnings, and we love it.

–Will he or won’t he? Zlatan Ibrahimovic trained normally with the club, and is now slated to be on the pitch to work his magic against Rubin Kazan. So let’s wait and see. My guess is that he won’t start, and won’t even play unless something crazy happens like Rubin scoring a goal …. or us desperately needing one to avoid a 0-0 draw. And he shouldn’t. Let sleeping BANGS heal, I say. The season is long. Why risk him when we don’t have to?

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Written by:

In my fantasy life, I’m a Barca-crazed contributor over at Barcelona Football Blog. In my real life, I’m a full-time journalist at the Chicago Tribune, based in Chicago, Illinois.


  1. Eduard
    October 20, 2009

    lol, I love your “thong boy” segment.

  2. Blow-Granite
    October 20, 2009

    Thong boy segment was the funniest!!!

  3. October 20, 2009

    I wonder who fans the media flames regarding these absurd rumours… I’m curious to know how many deals are actually done before the transfer window actually opens and the clubs make it official and all that happens in the transfer window is that the player merely switches clubs.

    If it doesn’t happen then why do any of us show any credence to the rumours?

    Ps. Psyched for the game tonight!!! any idea if they are showing the game in india?

    • Blow-Granite
      October 20, 2009

      A lot of deals are done before the transfer window opens. Example: Ronald. I believe the Ronaldo deal to Madrid from ManU was done last year – one year before the transfer window opened.

    • Kxevin
      October 20, 2009

      Interesting question, Reagan. My guess is that 90% of transfers are done before the window even opens. Transferring players, even mid-level folks, is a complicated process that involves many lawyers, their lawyers, accountants, dwarves and psychologists.

      That takes more than a week or two. There is stuff going on, and conversations happening that we couldn’t even begin to speculate about, some real, some hypothetical.

      Journalists have sources all over the place, and some are even good sources. 😀 One guy gets a bit of scuttlebutt from a good source, rushes to print (real or cyber) and off we go.

      False rumors are also being planted, which is one thought that I have with all of this Robinho business. Txiki B. is rarely so forthcoming over a potential transfer target as he has been over Robinho. So is he the real target? Are we laying out a soft trail to hide our real target?

      If you think about it too much it will make you crazy, which is why it’s best to treat them all with a bit of humor and a massive, speculatory grain of salt until the guy lands at El Prat, and is seen kissing the crest.

      • Boat Forever
        October 20, 2009

        Even Kaka’s transfer was discussed way back before January & that’s the reason Kaka didn’t sign for Man City even though he wanted to HELP them financially… And yeah, all that fuss was to get the fans ready for the imminent departure!!!

  4. October 20, 2009

    Anyone want to run the liveblog today? It’s looking like I cannot.

  5. Soto
    October 20, 2009

    “and I’ll have to go to the oxygen tent to calm my hyperventilating lungs.”


    This reminds me how much I miss Special1TV and Rooney and his oxygen tank.

  6. October 20, 2009

    yeah.. always about the shock value and who has the most astonishing yet reliable story… (just like every article ever comes up with)

    Honestly, we’re lucky that our players are hardly in the news. I can understand why those arsenal fans had their knickers in a bunch when we were debating cesc’s next move. It would drive me up the wall if I knew that even Bojan, Pedro or Busquets were being tapped in the news in the way Cesc and Robinho are today.

    Additionally, you make an excellent point about the soft trail Kxevin. One might wonder how much Maxwell would have cost if he were all over the news before he can came to us for a paltry amount. I’d like to see us snapping up Willian/Suarez in January under the sneaky blanket of Robinho rumours… if your potential theory holds good ofcourse 🙂

  7. Boat Forever
    October 20, 2009

    “Another world-class defender. Wonder if he can play forward?”

    Well if you are really interested we can play Piquenbauer up front you know, he’s on his way to win the golden boot for world cup… Why not!? 😉

  8. Blow-Granite
    October 20, 2009

    Barca confirmed lineups: (4-3-3) – Victor Valdes; Dani Alves, Marquez, Pique, Abidal; Xavi, Toure, Iniesta; Messi, Ibrahimovic, Pedro.

    • Miguel
      October 20, 2009

      nice. hope i get to watch it. anybody know if fsc or fse is rebroadcasting this tonight???

  9. jordi
    October 20, 2009

    Says marca:


  10. messsi108
    October 20, 2009

    Thong boy segment was ROFL stuff!!!

  11. Boat Forever
    October 20, 2009

    For all the fellow Indian Cules out there, ten Sports is telecasting the replay of Barca match immediately after Pool vs Lyon… Enjoy 🙂
    PS: Xavi listened to my prayer last time and made the Indian channels realize how dumb they are and made them telecast this time. In fact every Tuesday night at 10:30 I guess, ten Sports is telecasting the replay of our weekend’s Liga game 🙂

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